


Choice, Chance, and Change

by liketolaugh



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Antagonism, Conflict Resolution, Forgiveness, M/M, Polyamory, Pre-Polyamory?, They're trying okay, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M, or an attempt at it, something like that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-18
Updated: 2016-11-18
Packaged: 2018-08-31 17:14:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8586964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liketolaugh/pseuds/liketolaugh
Summary: It started with regret. It might have ended in jealousy and a hell of a love triangle, but Allen doesn't want that. So Link and Kanda try to work it out. It sort of works.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hurryup](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hurryup/gifts).



The door slammed behind Kanda, and Komui considered it for a moment, then looked at Reever.

“Any idea what his issue is?” he wondered, because for all of his former temperament, Kanda had really been much calmer as of late.

Reever hummed, and though the sound was _almost_ noncommittal, Komui could hear the fond amusement behind it. “Link made Allen mitarashi dango yesterday and then cut his hair for him. And Allen gave Kanda a new bottle of sword polish.”

“Ah,” Komui nodded, understanding perfectly.

Kanda and Link had been feuding over Allen’s affections since their return to the Order. Last Komui had checked, there were betting pools for which of them would ‘get the girl’, how long it would take, and on whether or not Allen was intentionally sabotaging their attempts by returning the favors.

“And Lenalee…?” Komui prompted, because normally calming Kanda down was her self-assigned task. He had sound evidence that he was going to her for ideas, too.

“Still trying to figure out how to let Lavi down easy,” Reever finished for him, the corners of his lips twitching. Lavi seemed to be distracting himself from his trauma by pining after Lenalee, and Komui was letting it slide (for now!) because Lenalee wasn’t interested in the least, and Lavi wasn’t pushing it.

Komui nodded again. “Marie?” Marie was usually there to calm Kanda down when Lenalee was busy.

“Pining after Miranda,” Reever informed him, trying not to grin. “He’s said he’s going to ask her soon, but apparently something always comes up.”

Komui considered. “When did the Order become a hellhole of teenage hormones?” he asked.

Reever started laughing.

* * *

 _They look good together,_ Link thought distantly, frowning at the two exorcists sparring in the middle of the training room.

The mission had been a satisfying success, the latest in an ever-lengthening line of them. Because since their return to the Order, the three of them had been assigned to missions together consistently and often – Link because he was still not permitted to part from Allen, Kanda because Central still wanted a means of putting Allen down if necessary, and no one else, generally, because quite frankly the three of them together was already overkill.

If Link was honest, it was bringing an already volatile situation to its boiling point.

“And anyway, I thought you’d be _happy_ to not have to go get oil, you ingrate,” Allen complained, huffing at Kanda as he retracted his arm from a block.

Kanda scowled at him. “I can get my own damn oil,” he muttered, and then struck out again, his palm reaching for Allen’s shoulder in an opening shove. “You should worry about yourself, with how much money you need for food, glutton beansprout!”

Allen moved with the blow, absorbing it, and then ducked under and around. Kanda cursed and spun, meeting Allen’s rabbit-swift blow with a block of his own and a knee aimed at Allen’s stomach.

Allen stepped back to avoid it and countered, “At least I eat more than just soba, stupid Kanda! Don’t you know it’s bad to put all your calories in one food group? You need a _balanced diet.”_ His eyes sparkled with amusement even as he slid fluidly around Kanda, moving in for another swift, hard blow.

“What do you know about a _balanced diet?_ All you eat is meat and sweet things!” Kanda hissed as the hit connected with his ribs, and swiped at Allen’s face with his elbow, barely missing.

The two exorcists fell into the flex and shove of straining muscles, never letting up their banter, and Link frowned, brown eyes melancholy, at the easy familiarity translated into both motion and word.

It had started with regret. There was still that, somewhere, in the easiness of favors granted to Allen.

It had been the two of them, trying to earn the forgiveness already granted. Separately, at first, each seeking their own fulfillment, and then competitively, as they each began to feel their own inadequacy in the face of the other’s efforts.

And then something else had started to factor in, when he realized just how much he liked Allen’s smile and the simple delight Allen exuded with each fresh kindness. When a sour curl started to simmer in his stomach when Kanda claimed those things for himself.

That jealousy was unbecoming made little difference.

Allen hooked his ankle behind Kanda’s leg and sent them both tumbling to the ground, Allen on top smirking down at Kanda, clear silver eyes bright with energy.

“Ha,” Allen panted, one knee planted in Kanda’s stomach to make the man wheeze. “Looks like my _very balanced diet_ wins out, huh, Kanda?”

Kanda scowled up at Allen. “Your _very fucking balanced diet_ makes you feel like a damn whale,” he snapped. “Get off of me.”

Allen dug his knee in and grinned devilishly. “What was that, Kanda? Did you say something?”

Kanda snarled and heaved up, and Allen yelped as their positions abruptly reversed, Kanda pinning Allen to the ground.

“I _said,”_ Kanda said, very clearly, “that you’re a _fucking glutton_ and it damn well feels like it.”

The problem was - just below the surface, Allen was one of the most passionate people Link had ever had the pleasure of knowing. And there was no one, Link knew, who could bring that out or match it as well as Kanda could.

The thought made him ache unpleasantly, and he watched Allen wistfully, tracking his movements as he struggled under Kanda, then finally gave up and said, half-smiling,

“I like food, what can I say?”

Kanda rolled his eyes, but looked satisfied, starting to rise. “As long as you admit-”

His hair tie snapped, and his eyes went almost comically wide with surprise as his hair fell unceremoniously out of its ponytail and around his shoulders.

* * *

Allen laughed, and Kanda scowled, trying hard not to show his embarrassment even as the tips of his hair threatened to tickle Allen’s cheeks.

Then, from nowhere – around his wrist, probably – Allen produced a hair tie and held it up, still lying on his back with a knowing, playful smirk on his face.

“Need this?” Allen asked, amused, wriggling the hair tie enticingly.

It was these things that were driving Kanda nuts – these little thoughtful things Allen had started to do once he’d noticed just how many favors Kanda _(and Link,_ Kanda thought bitterly) was doing for him. It made Kanda feel like he had to work harder, as stupid as it probably was – as far as Allen was concerned, Kanda was just doing nice things for the hell of it.

Idiot beansprout.

Kanda snatched the tie out of Allen’s fingers and sat back on his heels, frowning at Allen even as he let it slide onto his wrist. “How long have you had that around your wrist?” he demanded. “Were you just waiting for mine to break, stupid beansprout?”

“More or less,” Allen admitted shamelessly, pushing himself up onto his elbows. “Lenalee’s always complaining about you using hers, after all, and God knows you can barely get through a battle without losing it anyway.”

Kanda scowled harder, but reached up to tie his hair back up anyway. “I don’t _always_ steal Lenalee’s,” he muttered petulantly. Sometimes he stole Link’s. No one ever said Kanda wasn’t petty.

Allen’s eyes sparkled at him with unspoken laughter, and Kanda rolled his eyes and stood up, making room for Allen to spring up in an easy, fluid motion barely hindered by the bruises of the spar or the aches of the mission they’d just returned from.

“I’m sure she appreciates your restraint,” Allen said mildly. “Or she would if you had any.”

Kanda growled at Allen, a vein in his forehead pulsing. “You wanna fucking go?” he demanded, taking a half-threatening step forward.

He saw Allen’s eyes light up at the challenge and felt a smirk starting to curl his own lips, but then fucking _Link_ appeared as if he’d _teleported,_ too close to Allen and frowning at Kanda.

“I think that’s quite enough for today,” Link said sternly, arms crossing. “We’re only just off from the mission, after all, and Walker is still injured.” His gaze flicked back to Allen and warmed slightly. “Besides, it’s just about time for lunch.”

Of course, the glutton beansprout’s eyes lit up instantly at the mention of food, and Kanda cursed internally, knowing he’d lost this particular battle. _Again._

“I’m not hurt that bad,” Allen protested, turning away from Kanda and toward Link, though the interest in his eyes didn’t leave. “Really! In a few days I’ll be good as new.”

“In a few days,” Link agreed, frowning and serious. “But not _now,_ Walker. Do at least pretend to take care of yourself.”

Allen laughed and rubbed the back of his neck bashfully, head tilting. “I guess I’m not real good at that, huh?” His smile softened. “Seems like you’re more than willing to worry about it for me, though.”

Link started, color rising on his cheeks, and then coughed, eyes on Allen as if they couldn’t be torn away. “Well, _someone_ has to.”

The thing was. The thing was, for all that he hid a part of himself that was passionate and even angry, there was nothing Allen loved more than to _be_ loved – Johnny had proven that much, way back when. He liked the soft things, the smiles and the compliments and the open sincerity. Things Kanda couldn’t give him.

But Link. Fucking _Link._

Link _could,_ and Kanda thoroughly resented him for it.

Kanda cleared his throat loudly, making both of the others start, and jerked his head at the door.

“Are we going or aren’t we?” he snapped, unable to keep the irritation from his voice and not really bothering to try. “Or are you going to nag some more, two-spot?”

Link’s eyes flashed to his and cooled with matching dislike. “I don’t _nag,”_ he said stiffly, while Allen’s smile faded into a frown as his gaze flickered between them worriedly. “I simply prefer to keep Walker in one piece. I believe that’s not a particular concern of yours?”

Kanda’s expression chilled to steel. “More mine than yours,” he hissed. “Watchdog.”

A glare started to bloom across Link’s face, and Allen broke in hastily, physically placing himself between them with a slightly nervous smile that was, annoyingly, no less charming for the discomfort.

“Weren’t we going to lunch? Kanda, I bet Jerry has your soba ready already. And Link, I know you must be hungry by now too.” His smile widened a little as their attention turned to him. “I’m starved, myself. I could eat a horse!”

* * *

Allen wasn’t an idiot, actually. Or oblivious, or clueless, or anything else he’d heard Lavi and Lenalee speculating about behind his back, among many others.

He was well aware of the fact that both Link and Kanda had fallen for him, that the gifts and indulgences granted to him were no longer the means of repentance they used to be, and that the tension between them was no longer a simple clash of personality and past.

He just wasn’t sure what to _do_ about it.

(Or, for that matter, _why.)_

It was obvious even now, in the nasty little scowls Kanda made a point of sending Link’s way, and in the staunch, stubborn way Link refused to look at Kanda, studiously paying attention only to his food or, when spoken to, to Allen.

Finally, Kanda broke away long enough to look at Allen and say abruptly, “You still suck with that sword of yours, by the way. Dumbass.”

The corner of Allen’s lip twitched despite himself. “Well, I haven’t had as long as you to practice, stupid Kanda. I’ll get better.”

“Not with your fighting style, you won’t,” Kanda sniped, relaxing a little and getting that look in his eyes – not softness and not warmth, but a near-content look he granted only to Allen. “You need a teacher for that, idiot beansprout.”

Allen let his eyebrows quirk up. “Are you offering?”

The brief flicker of Kanda’s eyes away from his let him know that that was _exactly_ what Kanda had been getting at, and Allen barely managed to keep his smile from widening, warmth spreading through him.

Their rivalry was upsetting at best, but it was still… _nice._ That they wanted him.

“Yeah,” Kanda said at last, gaze flicking back to meet Allen’s with a challenge Allen was more than happy to meet. “I am. It’s my ass you’ll be stabbing if you swing your stupidly giant sword the wrong way.”

“Like it would hurt you,” Allen said peevishly, and glanced Link’s way.

Link looked startled, apprehension and distress coloring the corners of his eyes, and Allen nearly winced; of course, this, like so many things, could be interpreted as him picking one of them over the other.

That was the last thing Allen wanted, of course. He didn’t want to alienate either of them. He didn’t want to _lose_ either of them.

So he couldn’t be with either one. Not as long as they couldn’t get along.

No, he would much rather stay like this than risk losing it. After all, Allen didn’t make bets when he couldn’t control the outcome.

“Besides,” he said to Link, giving him a small smile, “I’ll get hurt less often if I’m better, won’t I?”

Link gave him a hesitant smile in return, relaxing subtly. “That would be a nice change of pace,” he said dryly, setting his hand down flat on the table.

“He’d get hurt even less if you weren’t such a useless piece of shit,” Kanda muttered snidely, scowling at his bowl of soba.

Link tensed right back up, of course, and Allen repressed the urge to sigh. “Don’t be so pointlessly antagonistic,” Link said sharply, finally glancing over at Kanda with a faint glare. “We _do_ have to work together.”

“Believe me, I know,” Kanda growled, raising his head to center a glare on Link. “It makes me want to stab myself in the face just to spare myself the aggravation.”

“Haven’t you said that about me before?” Allen broke in, voice slightly higher than usual, gaze flicking anxiously between the two rivals. “Anyway, I’m not sure that would help so much, given the whole healing thing.”

Kanda broke his glare to roll his eyes at Allen, and Allen gave him a grin that was meant to be teasing but was probably tinged with uneasiness. Either way, it made Kanda scowl uncomfortably and look away, while Link slowly relaxed as it became clear that Kanda had resigned from the conversation, and the three of them descended into uneasy silence.

Allen himself returned to his food, working his way through most of the remainder before he slowed briefly, gaze wandering wistfully over the two men sitting with him, and before he could stop himself, his thoughts slipped from his tongue.

“I wish you two could get along.”

* * *

Link couldn’t say that he was entirely surprised when Kanda took a moment, after Allen went to bed but before Link could join him, to grab him by the arm and drag him away. He only wondered whether Kanda was going to attempt to beat him into surrender or earn his compliance some other way.

So he _was_ surprised when Kanda’s first words, after the door shut behind them, were, “You owe him at _least_ as much as I do, asshole.”

Link took a moment to absorb that, and then raised an eyebrow, trying to suppress his roiling emotions.

“Is this meant to be some form of shovel talk?” he asked mildly, keeping his gaze steady on Kanda’s. “Or perhaps a warning, to stay away from your territory?”

 _“No,_ you fucking _dumbass,”_ Kanda snapped, looking as irate with him as ever. “He wants us to get along, doesn’t he? And I owe him that much, okay? And if I do, _you fucking do too.”_

Link’s eyes widened slightly, because while he agreed with the sentiment in its entirety, he certainly hadn’t expected Kanda to be as reasonable, and _certainly_ not for him to instigate any form of conflict resolution.

If he’d had any doubts about Kanda’s seriousness before, this certainly would have blown them out of the water.

With a breath, Link forced himself to relax, and gave Kanda a courteous nod.

“Certainly,” he said, unable to force the stiffness from his voice. Then, because he had best be at least as helpful as the disagreeable ten-year-old, “I apologize for jumping to conclusions.”

Kanda’s eyes narrowed slightly, apparently suspicious of Link’s words, but after a moment, he nodded.

“Tell me, then,” Kanda demanded harshly, his courtesy apparently only going so far, “what the _fuck_ do you want with him?”

So after all this time, Kanda still thought he might be there simply as a monitor to Allen Walker.

Link raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms, insisting to himself that the move was _not_ defensive. “The same thing you do, I expect. I want to be by his side-” He hesitated briefly, and then continued defiantly, “As more than a friend or an ally.”

“Then why the _favors?”_ Kanda hissed, with some form of disgust.

Link had to actively keep the sneer from curling his lips, and wondered to himself why the one thing Allen actually _wanted_ from them had to be so _difficult._

“As you so kindly pointed out,” Link said coolly, “I have as much to repent for as you do. And like you, Allen did not expect me to earn it.”

Kanda growled irately and then, abruptly, drew away to pace impatiently, scowling at the ground.

“He’s such a fucking _dumbass,”_ Kanda burst out after a few awkward minutes, frustration in every line of his body. “What, does he think he’s _helping?”_

Link shrugged noncommittally, frowning at Kanda as the man continued pacing agitatedly.

“You can’t just _forgive_ like that,” Kanda continued, more to himself than Link, Link thought. “It’s just… fuck, I don’t know, _empty._ It doesn’t sit right. How does he do that? Why isn’t he fucking _mad?”_

Despite himself, Link felt his muscles relax a little, expression softening. “I suppose he doesn’t place enough blame on us – rather, he puts it down to circumstance and is happy to accept new ones.”

Kanda just scowled, though Link got the feeling that it was more at what Link had said than at Link himself this time. _“Circumstance,_ fuck. It only excuses so much, you know?”

“I know,” Link agreed.

Kanda spun around and studied him for a moment, really studied him, with an intelligence Link hadn’t remotely suspected of him. A lapse of judgement.

“Yeah, I guess you do,” Kanda said at last, grudgingly. And then, “He really did forgive both of us, didn’t he?”

Link hesitated, too, and then nodded. “Without a second thought.”

 _“Fuck.”_ Kanda let himself slump briefly against the wall behind him, scowling at the floor. “…We really gotta do this, don’t we?”

Link let the corners of his lips twitch. “Unless we want to remain in romantic limbo. As I suspect that Allen is content to remain there until matters are resolved.” A half-shrug. “He won’t make a choice so long as it would alienate either one of us, I think.”

“Ugh.” Kanda scowled. “He’s such a dumbass.”

Link almost smiled at that, rueful and amused and a little disbelieving. “Perhaps,” he allowed after a moment, and left it at that.

_“…Ugh.”_

* * *

Allen was sitting up when they arrived at the room, worried silver eyes on the door.

“Link!” he exclaimed, almost making to spring to his feet. “I was starting to worry- Kanda?” He broke off in confusion, tilting his head slightly as his gaze moved from Link to Kanda and back, shifting into something more questioning.

Link gave him a small smile. “Kanda and I… worked things out, shall we say,” he said delicately.

Allen paused, processing that, and Kanda nearly rolled his eyes, and then _had_ to look away when a slow, blinding look of delight spread across his face.

“That’s great,” Allen said sincerely. “I’m so happy.”

Link’s smile widened and softened, and Kanda ‘che’ed, glancing away as Link crossed the room to sit by Allen, looking entirely too pleased.

“So yeah,” Kanda said, half-defiantly, arms crossed. “You can’t bitch about that anymore, stupid beansprout.” He jerked his head at the door. “It’s late as fuck, so-”

“Wait,” Allen said earnestly, leaning forward to fix him with those _stupid_ wide, sincere grey eyes. “You’re leaving already?”

“It’s late as fuck,” Kanda repeated, a little lower as he eyed Allen warily.

“You could…” Allen hesitated, and Kanda clenched his fist, not breaking his gaze from Allen’s. Allen smiled hopefully, and finished, “You could sleep here tonight. The bed’s just big enough for all of us, I think.”

Kanda couldn’t stop his eyes from widening, and they flicked briefly to Link, who looked just as startled.

Just as startled, but not aggressive.

…Fuck it.

“Whatever,” he muttered, gaze dropping because _fuck_ he couldn’t meet Allen’s. “Easier than going to mine, anyway.”

Allen gave him a delighted smile, and then Link was lying down, Allen was beside him, and sure enough, there was just enough room for Kanda to slip in on the edge and not fall off.

It was warm, and comfortable. He could feel Allen breathing beside him, and could even reach to press his hand on his chest and feel his heartbeat, except his fingers brushed Link’s and both of them jerked away.

But neither of them left. All three of them stayed, all in this one bed together. It clicked.

 _Oh, fuck,_ Kanda thought dimly, head still clouded and heady from Allen’s presence beside him. _Is this really what he wants?_

Then Allen smiled at him sleepily, reached out to intertwine his hand with Kanda’s even as he pressed his body back into Link’s, and Kanda promptly banished the thought for another time, preferably _never._

He’d worry about it then.


End file.
